Freeing Up Your Thinking

Identify ways that you talk to yourself that limit your freedom or power to act or recognize possibilities.

Activity: Have people (at work or at home) think of a problem and complete these sentences about it:

1.I want _____________ but ______________.

2.If it weren't for ____________, I'd _____________.

3.I can't _____________ because ____________.

Afterwards, have them "correct" their sentences, by making these changes:

1.Change "but" to "and."

2.Cross out what is in the first blank, and write "my own ___" or "my fear of ___" or "my habit of ___."

3.Change "can't" to "won't".

Have people share with the group how changing the way they talk to themselves about the problem frees them to think or act differently toward it.

Creative Discipline Ideas

1. Start with Structure

Don't Use Your Mouth, Use Your Routine

Instead of providing order all day long with your words, set up clear, daily structure beforehand.

Cut down on directing as you learn to choose your words wisely and sparingly.

2.If You Can't Change the Child, Change the Environment

Make concrete changes in the physical setup of the household so the environment, not you, dictates the rules, while your child enjoys some independence.

3.Follow Up with Follow-Through

Start with routines and rules that rely on your follow-through, not your child's. Let the consequences be your kid's reminder and your salvation.

4. Stay Grounded with Ground Rules

Stick to your nonnegotiable rules, and keep your credibility. You can stay grounded and keep your kids from breaking you down with their masterful use of logic and reason.

5. Go for Negotiation

Create rules with your children, not just for them. They will be more likely to cooperate, and rules can be seen as a positive tool to create order rather than a weapon used to clobber our kids.

Diversity and Work/Life Toolkit | Diversity and Work/Life | Home